Channel Five’s schedule
For most every day
Benefits Street cesspool
And Welfarers Way
Ramsay Street Scroungers
Then Home and Away
They’re idlers and loungers
In old Summer Bay
Then Stateside US
For our afternoon treat
It’s NCIS:
No Current Income Street
Lights, Camera, Sanctions
A click of a mouse
Audience reactions
From the Big Benefits house
– Candid Camera
– Catches claimants
– Homes Under Hammers
– Bloody Shameless
– Bailiffs on bonuses
– Pounding the loan shark beat
– Blameless for homelessness
– It’s pay day on No-mark Street
Let’s have Fat Cats on Fridays
From the posh end of town
With the Jags in the driveways
And the shutters pulled down
Downing Street Dossers
Millionaires Row
Job-cutting Bosses
Fraudsters and Co.
Tax-dodgers’ Boulevard
Rate-fixing Avenue
Corporate Crime Street
C’mon – let’s be having you!
