In the 1790s, poet William Blake wrote ‘The Marriage of Heaven and Hell‘, which included ‘Proverbs of Hell’. Here is a modern poem of proverbs …


If it ain’t broke, it soon will be
If you want to get ahead, get yourself a trilby

A roast duck won’t fly into the mouth of a peasant
No man is an island but some are a desert

He who laughs last took longest to get the joke
A dog in a manger beats a pig in a poke

A bird in Handsworth, two in Shepherd’s Bush
Don’t try to pull when the sign says push

No quarter given, no ifs and no buts
Lie down with Tories, get up with cuts

If you fall off the wagon, get back on your bike
The longer the picket line, the shorter the strike

Drink in haste, throw up at leisure
X marks the candidate – it doesn’t mark the treasure

Too many cooks make too much food
Vote for a tool and you’re going to get screwed

A cat may look at a king
A cat may look at any bloody thing she wants to


The dogs of war are noisier than the doves of peace
Wonders, dripping taps and nagging doubts will never cease

Don’t mistake words for actions or confidence for competence
Don’t believe a single word from Tory Party conference

Those who don’t learn from hsitory are doomed to re-enactments
The voice of the workers does not come in Eton College accents

The enemy of your enemy may be your enemy not your friend
The means may not be justified by the bitter end

If you ask a stupid question then expect a daft reply
Each sentence has to reach an end and every life must die


The road to rebellion leads to the palace of liberation
To maximise satisfaction, minimise expectation

The crocodiles of temptation drown the zebras of resolve
Great big nasty tossers from little gits evolve

Chew over all the options before you pick and choose
If you fight you might not win, but if you don’t you’re sure to lose

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