Where is your title from?
My father.
No, but where is it really from?
It’s been in the family for years.
But where did your people get it from?
I believe it was conferred on my noble ancestors by the monarch of the time.
Oh I can see I am going to have a challenge getting you to say where your title is from. When did your family first obtain it?
OK, then. My ancestors took land for themselves, made those who worked on it into their serfs, fought on the right side in some war or other, kissed royal arse, and married their offspring to other similar noble families in order to share titles.
Where is your vast wealth from?
I’ve always had it.
No, but where is it really from?
It’s been in the family for years.
But where did your people get it from?
My hard-working ancestors and I created wealth by graciously allowing people to work for us.
Oh I can see I am going to have a challenge getting you to say where your vast wealth is from. When did your family first obtain it?
Ok, then. For generations, my family have grown obscenely rich from the labour of those who live and work on the land that we own (I refer you to the previous question). We give them just enough to keep them coming back and keep the rest for ourselves. And we plundered quite a bit as well. And our wealth generates more wealth. Spiffing.
Where is your racism from?
I simply know that some people are better than others.
No, but where is it really from?
It’s been in the family for years.
But where did your people get it from?
From our superior genes, larger brains, blue blood, and weak chins.
Oh I can see I am going to have a challenge getting you to say where your racism is from. When did your family first obtain it?
OK, then. Daddy’s daddy’s daddy’s daddy and his chums had to justify taking over other countries and trading in Africans, so they encouraged all sorts of frightfully clever theories about racial inferiority. It worked so splendidly well that we even ended up believing it ourselves. And obviously, the fact that we are enormously wealthy and privileged just proves that we are superior. Jolly good show!
