Ta-ra Tories
Ta-ra Penny
Let’s hope that the end of Ms Mordaunt
turns out to be some sort of portent
of Conservative death
the Tories’ last breath
and spares us from more of their torment
Writing: Limericks
Five-line poems, usually funny or light-hearted; the first, second and fifth lines rhyme with each other; the third and fourth lines also rhyme with each other, and are shorter.
The End of the End of Austerity
It’s the end of the end of austerity Can you believe the temerity? Sajid has said That his promise is dead But the few will retain their prosperity “Austerity no more” is no more The previous promise ignored The election … Read more
Where Has Everyone Gone?
Move to the ground in the centre, you said Nobody likes a dissenter, you said Victory hinges On leaving the fringes Let us move to the centre, you said Come down from the high ground, you claimed that we must … Read more
Cameron Cares?
That tear-stained bit of David Cameron’s Conservative Party conference speech … “How very dare you suggest I don’t care for the great NHS? I love it so dearly I’d sell it for nearly As much as my granny – or … Read more
An Ode to William Hague
The Foreign Secretary’s called William Hague His purpose in life is quite vague We sent him to Iraq But they sent him straight back Saying they’d rather have a dose of the plague
An Ode to Jeremy Hunt
The Health Secretary’s named Jeremy Hunt He sits on the benches at front It would, inter alia, Insult female genitalia To call him a vile Tory cunt
West Coast Franchising Chaos
In 2012, the awarding of the franchise for the West Coast railway route descended into chaos, when the government gave the job to FirstGroup in preference to Virgin, then admitted irregularities and started all over again. Two limericks: 1. A … Read more
Gideon’s Budget 2012
Two limericks for Gideon George Osborne’s 2012 Budget: 1. We can be sure that in Gideon’s budget However the media judge it There’ll be gifts for the rich For the rest, not a stitch And Labour’s poor leaders will fudge … Read more
Mrs Wales Is Having A Baby
There once was a princess called Kate Who noticed her period was late Each time she vomited The media commented And worshipped the future head of state
An Ode to Tube Cleaning
A right filthy job is Tube cleaning We slave while the bosses are preening We work night and day No pension or sick pay And the wages are truly demeaning But cleaners won’t let them attack us Harass us, track … Read more